When I was a lot younger I was convinced that the word chimney had an ‘L’ in it. That’s right I thought the word was pronounced chimley. I’m sure as you say that out loud to yourself you, like me, realise that this is a much more audibly pleasing word. It rolls off the tongue more smoothly than the jarring chimney monstrosity. In fact I can almost hear you joining with me in a chorus of ‘Chim chim-a-ley chim chim-a-ley chim chim charaaaaa….’ Nothing could convince me otherwise. And when, eventually the hardcore word evidence (dictionary) was dragged out to show me the errors of my spelling ways, I obviously proclaimed the dictionary incorrect. I don’t know where I got the idea that chimney was spelt differently or why I argued so hard. I have a theory that a word gnome crept into my bedroom one night whisper the word chimley in my ear then legged it, but that’s only speculation. I now know, after many painful years, I was wrong. My life story is littered with examples like this, where I thought I knew best. Rather than learning this lesson, I seem to be stuck repeating the same mistakes, but sadly on a bigger scale each time.
And so it goes with God, I tell Him how to operate, how to dispense justice, to look on me and mine with favour but turn His back on those I deem unworthy. I ask Him to stand by me, while I walk away from Him, to act in a way that pleases me, while my acts sadden Him. I procrastinate instead of obey, play instead of pray, and judge instead of love. All the while He waits for me, watching, guiding, helping. Taking immense joy in my baby steps towards Him, wishing I would stop dwelling on my failures, my successes, my insecurities and my pride and instead dwell in Him as He dwells in me.
Psalm 103: 2-5 ‘Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits— who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.’
How do I know God is waiting for me, wanting me to receive His benefits? Because He, as the creator is in the perfect position to know me –
Psalm 103:13-14 ‘As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.’
I know because He knows me, how I was made, what I was made from, the weakness blended with Godly strength, the foolishness entwined with true wisdom, the capacity to venomously hate right next to a heart full and waiting to love. Maybe if we didn’t know weakness we would not recognise His strength, without foolishness true wisdom would be the norm, and without hate love would not touch our hearts. I’m glad He knows best – are you?